"Enthusiasm"

Annie's first experience with chopsticks.  She actually did really well! Ate everything on her plate without resorting to stabbing it with just one chopstick!

I am not a cheerleader.  It's a shock, I know! Sure, for about 3 seconds in 7th grade I thought it might be cool to twinkle my spirit fingers, but I got over it fairly quickly.  Even today, I don't show my excitement for most things by jumping up and down and squealing with delight.  I just get obsessed.  This process and it's end result had me more excited than I've been in a long time, and I have definitely even had some jump up and down or convulse with giddiness moments.  I am, as I've stated before, so beyond thrilled that this adoption is happening.  

... but it's a long wait.  I can't imagine how people go into this the "normal" way, knowing that their wait is going to be over three years, and be OK with that!  I can barely contain myself for the average of 12 months that the Waiting Child program involves.  

So, what do I do in the meantime?  Anything that makes me feel one step closer.  I am thrilled that the "Paper Chase" has begun.  Sure, it's a lot of bureaucracy and work to stay on top of, but it gives me something tangible to do. I feel like I am helping the process; working to get to my baby.  But it's not enough for me.  

Just like when I'm pregnant and impatiently awaiting my baby's arrival, I read over the "What to Expect" books, and follow WebMD's pregnancy calendar to see how my little one is growing each week, whatever helps chart the progress.  In this case though, it's whatever helps me feel like we're involved.  These things may not actually get us any closer, in reality.  They may even be a complete waste of time, but here's just a little of what we do:

 - I scour the grocery stores in search of chopsticks so we can all practice using them. (I ended up swiping some of the freebies from Publix's sushi section, with the permission of an employee, of course!)

 - We use said chopsticks to eat everything, including cantaloupe, goldfish crackers, and pieces of PB&J.  After all, we need practice.  China probably does not hand out babies to those who can't use chopsticks! ;)

 - We listen to some sort of "Relaxing Orient" music... not very authentic, I know, but it's what I can get my hands on for now... remember, we live in T'ville... pretty much the opposite of a cultural melting pot (but I love it!).

 - My DVR is set to record any show with "China" as a keyword.

 - I make pretty much anyone who comes through my door watch the agency's informational DVD. (Haven't seen it yet?  Come on over... I'll give you popcorn & tissues!)

And finally, I email the poor agency branch director at least 3 times a day.  She's such a good sport about it.  She kindly holds my hand and answers every silly question, and even comments that my most pointless emails ("Hi Kat, I know this email contains nothing productive. I just haven't heard anything from you yet today, and I thought I'd point out that half the blogs on the 'Proud Parents' page don't work. Would you like a detailed list as to which ones?  Have a wonderful day!") make her laugh and brighten her day.  Both she and the social worker have graciously said many times that they "appreciate my enthusiasm for all this.  I think they're partially just being nice and tolerating my need for confirmation, but honestly, how can you do this without being enthusiastic for it?

So, cheerleader or not, I have enthusiasm!

I also wanted to add this: 

Gracie's class was talking about China in Social Studies a while back.  She said she learned the Chinese character for "big."  Now, I'm sure her interpretation of this character is about as authentic as anything I make to eat with chopsticks, but I loved her picture here.  "It's the Chinese character for big, with lots of babies."  

Annie calls them "China's babies." I love that!  "Mommy, when will you go to get the China's babies?"